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The Dynasty of Harald Fairhair

The Blodok Royal Family of Himmelsk can trace its ancestry back to the first King of Norway, Harald I (Harald Haafager, Haafager meaning "fairhair"), who reigned from approximately 872 to 930 A.D. As such, it is the oldest reigning monarchy in the world.

Prior to Harald I's victory at the Battle of Hafrsfjord, Norway was composed of some 29 small kingdoms, but in 872 A.D. all of Norway came under Harald's control. He was to reign as the acknowledged King of Norway for more than 50 years.

Harald was the son of a minor Norwegian king, Halfdam the Swart, and his wife Queen Ragnhild. According to Norwegian legend, Ragnhild dreamed one night that as she was standing in her garden, she noticed a thorn had entangled in her dress. She pulled the thorn out and held it in her hand. As she did, the thorn grew into a large tree, which took root in the soil and spread its branches heavenward. The base of the tree was blood red, but further up, the trunk became vibrant green, and still further up, the tree's crown became snowy white.

Harald I had eight sons, the oldest of whom was Eric I Blodok (Blodok means "bloody axe"). Eric I's mother was Danish. While he was Harald I's designated successor as king, Eric I made his choice undisputed by killing all his brothers but one, the youngest, Haakon, who went into exile in England. Eric was to reign as king for five years during which he continued his father's penchant for sending out Viking raiding armadas to gather plunder to bring back to Norway.

One of the Viking armadas that Eric I Blodok sent out was placed under the command of Eric I's son, Knut I Blodok, and it is through Knut I that Himmelsk's reigning monarchy has descended through the ages, the title of king passing from monarch to eldest son for more than a millennium. Indeed for centuries, the succession line moved from king to oldest son, each taking in turn the traditional names of Harald, Eric and Knut. Thus King Harald would be succeeded by King Eric who in turn would be succeeded by King Knut. Knut's son would again be called Harald. It is of note than in the 1,070-plus years that have passed since King Knut I Blodok established the Himmelsk monarchy, there has never been a break in its all male lineage, a claim that such prominent monarchies as the Tudors of England cannot match. Such is the virility of the Blodoks.

The Blodoks would serve as the Himmelsk Royal Family through all its periods, on sea as Viking raiders, on a south Pacific island, and as the first western settlement in all the Americas, a tribute to the Himmelskns respect for the true meaning of the word Blodok. Then, in 1845, the kingdom was destroyed by an army of the United States and the Royal Family was sent into exile (for information on this mercurial change in the family fortunes, go to the Himmelsk History).

The Odyssey of the Royal Family

When the Royal Family was forced into exile by fiat of President James Polk of the United States, the family traveled from frontier town to frontier town, then on to Chicago. There Knut died, having spent the remainder of his life as a worker in the Chicago stockyards.

For generations the king's descendants, plagued with bad luck, proceeded from one part of the nation to another. Knut's son, Eric, is said to have founded the Standard Oil Company, but, pressed for cash, immediately sold the company to John D. Rockefeller for a mere $10. Eric Blodok eventually made his home in Johnstown, Pa., where he ran a successful hunting and fishing club until May 31, 1889, when two days of heavy rains caused a dam to break and the resultant torrent to flood the city (Eric and his family survived by clinging desperately to the roof of his floating clubhouse).

In 1903 Eric's son, Harald, is reported to have built a gasoline powered aircraft which he sold to a pair of Ohio machinists, Orville and Wilbur Wright, who went on to claim they had built the craft which featured so prominently in one of the modern world's greatest epics. On April 7, 1909, Arthur Blodok made it to the North Pole, only to find that he had been beaten to the site a day earlier by one Robert Edwin Peary, thus forfeiting a lucrative contract to have his likeness appear on the Wheaties cereal boxes. In 1912, Elsa Blodok Feinmeister purchased a ticket on a White Star steamship bound from Southampton, England, on its maiden voyage to New York. Four days out of port, the ship hit an iceberg and Elsa, allegedly refusing to leave her longtime "friend," John Jacob Astor, went down holding hands with the Astors on The Titanic.

In 1919, Boston native Harald Blodok, who had developed a prize herd of horses, saw them all killed when a 50-foot high iron tank owned by the Purity Distilling Company exploded, drowning the horses in a two-million-gallon tidal wave of molasses. In 1928, Mabel Blodok, a talented singer and actor, was forced by a sore throat to turn down a role in a pending Broadway musical called Diamond Lil. She was replaced by the unknown Mae West.

In 1937, Olive Blodok, a beauty by any standard, was asked to marry the King of England. She refused and on the rebound, the king tendered an invitation to Baltimore divorcee Wallis Warfield Simpson. That same year, another Blodok beauty, Cleo Blodok, accepted the invitation of pioneer aviatrix Amelia Earhart to accompany her on her attempt to circle the globe.

In 1948, Paul "Buddy" Blodok invented something he called a "transistor," but--convinced it had no practical use--abandoned the invention to concentrate on cold fusion. And in 1954, Charlie "Chuck" Blodok gave his cocker spaniel dog to future President Richard Nixon (whose daughters renamed the dog Checkers). Chuck later became a frequent visitor to the White House where he became a confident of Nixon aides John D. Ehrlichman and H. R. Halderman and a frequent visitor to the Watergate Hotel.

A generation later, Eric Blodok, the last of the Blodok line, settled in Hoboken, N. J., the owner of a combination used car lot and billiard parlor. In Hoboken, he met and married the former Clara Zabriskie, and they are parents of two sons, Knut and Aksel, and a daughter, Annelie. In 2004, Eric Blodok resumed the monarchy of Himmelsk, ending the exile saga of the Blodoks.

King Eric XV and Queen Clara of Himmelsk

As the 41st king of Himmelsk, Eric XV brings the glamour of Hoboken society to the Himmelsk monarchy. While not living amongst the regal splendor that is the Himmelsk Royal Court, he is an admired and respected businessman in Hoboken and a proud member of its Chamber of Commerce. Moving amid the Hoboken glitterati, Erik XV is a leader in the city's small but influential Norwegian community and his combined used car lot and billiard parlor is a vibrant gathering place for the city's intelligencia.

Queen Clara, nee Clara Rattazzi, is a product of Hoboken's large Italian community (20 percent of the city's population are Italian-Americans) which in addition to the Himmelsk Queen also produced Frank Sinatra of America's entertainment royalty. Clara was selected Queen of the Hoboken Italian Festival (held every year in September) in 1986 a harbinger of what her future held for her.

Knut, heir to the throne, is a graduate of Hoboken High (9th and Clinton Streets) where he starred on the wrestling team, and now serves as manager of one of the three Starbucks franchises (the one at 1205 Hudson Street) in Hoboken. His sister, Annelie, attends Hoboken High where she is a member of the cheerleading team. His younger brother, Aksel, also attends Hoboken High School where he is the captain of the chess team.

Note: If you have additional information on the Blodok family during any of its history, you are invited to submit same to: The Secretary of State, Himmelsk, 10 North Main, Cedar City, Utah 84720.

The Royal Family Succession

Harald I Fairhair 872-930(?) Norway Founder
Erik I Bloody Axe* 930-934(?)
Knut I 938-967(?) Island period
Harald II 967-999
Erik II 999-1010
Knut II 1010-1030
Harald III 1030-1047
Eric III 1047-1069
Knut III 1069-1093
Harald IV 1093-1124
Eric IV 1124-1167 American West period
Knut IV 1168-1196
Harald V 1196-1232
Eric V 1232-1272
Knut V 1271-1333**
Harald VI 1333-1368
Eric VI 1368-1403
Knut VI 1403-1443
Harald VII 1443-1492
Eric VII 1492-1493***
Knut VII 1493-1534
Harald VIII 1534-1567
Eric VIII 1567-1595
Knut VIII 1595-1633
Harald IX 1633-1667
Eric IX 1667-1710
Knut IX 1710-1743
Harald X 1743-1777
Eric X 1777-1827
Knut X**** 1827-1845 Exile period begins
Harald Blodok XI
Eric Blodok XI
Knut Blodok XI
Harald Blodok XII
Eric Blodok XII
Knut Blodok XII
Harald Blodok XIII
Eric Blodok XIII
Knut Blodok XIII
Harald Blodok XIV
Eric Blodok XIV
Knut Blodok XIV
Eric Blodok XV 2004- Monarchy restored

-----------------------

* Eric I Blodok ("bloody axe") reigned for less than five years and was deposed by his brother, Haakon, who came out of exile to assume the crown of Norway. King Knut I had departed Norway prior to his father's loss of the throne.

** Longest reign (62 years)

* **Shortest reign (less than one year).

**** King Knut X did not ascend to the throne for two years since he was only five years old at the time of his father's death. The acting King was his guardian, Prince Haakon. At age seven King Knut was deemed mature enough to assume the kingship.

Other items of contemporary interest

THE BLODOK NAME

The name Blodok is an ancient Norwegian word meaning "bloodaxe," the name given to the early Norwegian kings who were widely known as fierce warriors. It has passed down unchanged through more than 13 centuries.

THE CURRENT REIGNING COUPLE

The current reigning couple, King Eric and Queen Clara, live in Hoboken, New Jersey, where they own a combination used car lot and billiard parlor. They are prominent in New Jersey society circles and are affiliated with several social and civic clubs including the Hoboken Fight Club, the Brillo Beauty College Alumni Association, the Benevolent Order of Buffalo (B.O.B.), the Mechanics and Trades Union, and the Free Tibet Society.

Very active in volunteer services, King Eric has served as a Salvation Army Santa Claus, as the Easter Bunny for the Marymont Easter Egg Hunt, and as Chief Spelunk of the Hoboken Spelunkers Association. Queen Clara has served as president of Hoboken Chapter of the Marky Mark Fan Club, vice president and secretary of the Hoboken Chapter of the Engelbert Humperdink Fan Club, and has been a Homeroom Monitor for the Calabro Primary School.

The couple are parents of a daughter and two sons: Princess Annelie, Prince Knut and Price Aksel. Other members of the Royal Family include the Queen Mother as well as several aunts and uncles including Countess Agnes Blodok, and Count Edvard Gustav Blodok.

THE HIMMELSK CROWN JEWELS

The crown Jewels of Himmelsk are used at Coronations and other ceremonial events and are the regalia which has been used since the monarchy was restored four years ago. While the monarchy is in exile (during the time each year when the king and queen are at home in Hoboken, New Jersey), the crown jewels are stored for safe keeping in a vault at City Hall. The Crown Jewels have a checkered history. When the Himmelsk royalty was overthrown in 1846, it was long believed the jewels were stolen and sold on the black market. But all of the items being shown were found in a cave where they had been placed by loyal subjects of the Blodoks Family. The Crown Jewels were protected evidently by a Viking warrior whose body was recovered with the jewels. The body was found to be in remarkable condition, presumably preserved almost intact in a barrel of rum which the warrior evidently fell into when he expired. The monarch ordered the warrior be taken to a local taxidermist and the stuffed upper torso of the condottiere is on display during the Festival Royale, continuing to protect the crown jewels even in death.

The jewels consist of solid gold crowns especially fashioned by Himmelsk artisans and worn only at special national events, diamond studded tiaras worn solely by the queen or her daughters, jeweled brooches of precious stones, and other jewelry the monarchy has allowed to be displayed for the public during the Festival Royale. Other items found in the cave, such as the Sovereign's Orb, the jeweled Sword of Offering, the coronation ring, the Royal Mace, and the Great Sword of State remained locked in the vault and will not be seen by commoners until the next coronation.

Protecting the Crown Jewels while they are on display is a member of the King's Guard of Honor. The distinctive uniform was designed personally by the king and queen to reflect the royal dignity and was inspired by the uniforms of Napoleon's France, which the king and queen have long admired. The Guardsman protecting the jewels is equipped with a special weapon, the Kigamonic Revolver, which is regarded by security forces everywhere as the ultimate weaponry. The Guardsman himself has pledged to forfeit his life rather than let bums and other scalawags take off with the precious gems and golden crowns. He has been carefully trained and has been ordered not to smile during the period he is guarding the Crown Jewels. To make him smile could result in death both for the Guardsman and his tormentor(s).

THE MONARCH'S FLAG

According to Wikipedia, the official encyclopedia of the Monarchy, the raven banner (in Old Norse, Hrafnsmerki; in Old English, Hravenlandeye) was a flag, possibly totemic in nature, flown by various viking chieftains and other Scandinavian rulers during the ninth, 10th and 11th centuries CE. The flag, as depicted in Norse artwork, was roughly triangular, with a rounded outside edge on which there hung a series of tabs or tassels. It bore a resemblance to ornately carved "weather-vanes" used aboard Viking longships.

Scholars conjecture that the raven flag was a symbol of Odin, who was often depicted accompanied by two ravens named Hugin and Munin. Its intent may have been to strike fear in one's enemies by invoking the power of Odin. As one scholar notes: "The Anglo-Saxons probably thought that the banners were imbued with the evil powers of pagan idols, since the Anglo-Saxons were aware of the significance of Odin and his ravens in Norse mythology."

According to the Heimskringla, Harald Hardrada flew a raven banner called Landoyoan or "Land-waster"; whether this was the same banner as that flown by Sigurd of Northumbria is unclear. In a conversation between Harald and King Sweyn II of Denmark, Sveinn asked Harald which of his possessions of his he valued most highly. He answered that it was his banner (merki), Landoyoan. Thereupon Sveinn asked what virtue it had to be accounted so valuable. Harald replied that it was prophesied that victory would be his before whom this banner was borne; and added that this had been the case ever since he had obtained it. Thereupon Sveinn said, "I shall believe that your flag has this virtue if you fight three battles with King Magnus, your kinsman, and are victorious in all."

Years later, during Harald's invasion of England, Harald fought a pitched battle against two English earls outside York. Harald's Saga relates that when King Haraldr saw that the battle array of the English had come down along the ditch right opposite them, he had the trumpets blown and sharply urged his men to the attack, raising his banner called Landoyoan. And there so strong an attack was made by him that nothing held against it.

Harald's army flew the banner at the Battle of Stamford Bridge, where it was carried by a warrior named Frirek. After Harald was struck by an arrow and killed, his army fought fiercely for possession of the banner, and some of them went berserk in their frenzy to secure the flag. In the end the "magic" of the banner failed, and the bulk of the Norwegian army was slaughtered, with only a few escaping to their ships.

Other than the dragon banner of Olaf II of Norway, the Landoyoan of Harald Hardrada is the only early Norwegian royal standard described by Snorri Sturluson in the Heimskringla.


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	The Dynasty of Harald Fairhair The Blodok Royal Family of Himmelsk can trace its ancestry back to the first King of Norway, Harald I (Harald Haafager, Haafager meaning "fairhair"), who reigned from approximately 872 to 930 A.D. As such, it is the oldest reigning monarchy in the world. Prior to Harald I's victory at the Battle of Hafrsfjord, Norway was composed of some 29 small kingdoms, but in 872 A.D. all of Norway came under Harald's control. He was to reign as the acknowledged King of Norway for more than 50 years. Harald was the son of a minor Norwegian king, Halfdam the Swart, and his wife Queen Ragnhild. According to Norwegian legend, Ragnhild dreamed one night that as she was standing in her garden, she noticed a thorn had entangled in her dress. She pulled the thorn out and held it in her hand. As she did, the thorn grew into a large tree, which took root in the soil and spread its branches heavenward. The base of the tree was blood red, but further up, the trunk became vibrant green, and still further up, the tree's crown became snowy white. Harald I had eight sons, the oldest of whom was Eric I Blodok (Blodok means "bloody axe"). Eric I's mother was Danish. While he was Harald I's designated successor as king, Eric I made his choice undisputed by killing all his brothers but one, the youngest, Haakon, who went into exile in England. Eric was to reign as king for five years during which he continued his father's penchant for sending out Viking raiding armadas to gather plunder to bring back to Norway. One of the Viking armadas that Eric I Blodok sent out was placed under the command of Eric I's son, Knut I Blodok, and it is through Knut I that Himmelsk's reigning monarchy has descended through the ages, the title of king passing from monarch to eldest son for more than a millennium. Indeed for centuries, the succession line moved from king to oldest son, each taking in turn the traditional names of Harald, Eric and Knut. Thus King Harald would be succeeded by King Eric who in turn would be succeeded by King Knut. Knut's son would again be called Harald. It is of note than in the 1,070-plus years that have passed since King Knut I Blodok established the Himmelsk monarchy, there has never been a break in its all male lineage, a claim that such prominent monarchies as the Tudors of England cannot match. Such is the virility of the Blodoks. The Blodoks would serve as the Himmelsk Royal Family through all its periods, on sea as Viking raiders, on a south Pacific island, and as the first western settlement in all the Americas, a tribute to the Himmelskns respect for the true meaning of the word Blodok. Then, in 1845, the kingdom was destroyed by an army of the United States and the Royal Family was sent into exile (for information on this mercurial change in the family fortunes, go to the Himmelsk History). The Odyssey of the Royal Family When the Royal Family was forced into exile by fiat of President James Polk of the United States, the family traveled from frontier town to frontier town, then on to Chicago. There Knut died, having spent the remainder of his life as a worker in the Chicago stockyards. For generations the king's descendants, plagued with bad luck, proceeded from one part of the nation to another. Knut's son, Eric, is said to have founded the Standard Oil Company, but, pressed for cash, immediately sold the company to John D. Rockefeller for a mere $10. Eric Blodok eventually made his home in Johnstown, Pa., where he ran a successful hunting and fishing club until May 31, 1889, when two days of heavy rains caused a dam to break and the resultant torrent to flood the city (Eric and his family survived by clinging desperately to the roof of his floating clubhouse). In 1903 Eric's son, Harald, is reported to have built a gasoline powered aircraft which he sold to a pair of Ohio machinists, Orville and Wilbur Wright, who went on to claim they had built the craft which featured so prominently in one of the modern world's greatest epics. On April 7, 1909, Arthur Blodok made it to the North Pole, only to find that he had been beaten to the site a day earlier by one Robert Edwin Peary, thus forfeiting a lucrative contract to have his likeness appear on the Wheaties cereal boxes. In 1912, Elsa Blodok Feinmeister purchased a ticket on a White Star steamship bound from Southampton, England, on its maiden voyage to New York. Four days out of port, the ship hit an iceberg and Elsa, allegedly refusing to leave her longtime "friend," John Jacob Astor, went down holding hands with the Astors on The Titanic. In 1919, Boston native Harald Blodok, who had developed a prize herd of horses, saw them all killed when a 50-foot high iron tank owned by the Purity Distilling Company exploded, drowning the horses in a two-million-gallon tidal wave of molasses. In 1928, Mabel Blodok, a talented singer and actor, was forced by a sore throat to turn down a role in a pending Broadway musical called Diamond Lil. She was replaced by the unknown Mae West. In 1937, Olive Blodok, a beauty by any standard, was asked to marry the King of England. She refused and on the rebound, the king tendered an invitation to Baltimore divorcee Wallis Warfield Simpson. That same year, another Blodok beauty, Cleo Blodok, accepted the invitation of pioneer aviatrix Amelia Earhart to accompany her on her attempt to circle the globe. In 1948, Paul "Buddy" Blodok invented something he called a "transistor," but--convinced it had no practical use--abandoned the invention to concentrate on cold fusion. And in 1954, Charlie "Chuck" Blodok gave his cocker spaniel dog to future President Richard Nixon (whose daughters renamed the dog Checkers). Chuck later became a frequent visitor to the White House where he became a confident of Nixon aides John D. Ehrlichman and H. R. Halderman and a frequent visitor to the Watergate Hotel. A generation later, Eric Blodok, the last of the Blodok line, settled in Hoboken, N. J., the owner of a combination used car lot and billiard parlor. In Hoboken, he met and married the former Clara Zabriskie, and they are parents of two sons, Knut and Aksel, and a daughter, Annelie. In 2004, Eric Blodok resumed the monarchy of Himmelsk, ending the exile saga of the Blodoks. King Eric XV and Queen Clara of Himmelsk As the 41st king of Himmelsk, Eric XV brings the glamour of Hoboken society to the Himmelsk monarchy. While not living amongst the regal splendor that is the Himmelsk Royal Court, he is an admired and respected businessman in Hoboken and a proud member of its Chamber of Commerce. Moving amid the Hoboken glitterati, Erik XV is a leader in the city's small but influential Norwegian community and his combined used car lot and billiard parlor is a vibrant gathering place for the city's intelligencia. Queen Clara, nee Clara Rattazzi, is a product of Hoboken's large Italian community (20 percent of the city's population are Italian-Americans) which in addition to the Himmelsk Queen also produced Frank Sinatra of America's entertainment royalty. Clara was selected Queen of the Hoboken Italian Festival (held every year in September) in 1986 a harbinger of what her future held for her. Knut, heir to the throne, is a graduate of Hoboken High (9th and Clinton Streets) where he starred on the wrestling team, and now serves as manager of one of the three Starbucks franchises (the one at 1205 Hudson Street) in Hoboken. His sister, Annelie, attends Hoboken High where she is a member of the cheerleading team. His younger brother, Aksel, also attends Hoboken High School where he is the captain of the chess team. Note: If you have additional information on the Blodok family during any of its history, you are invited to submit same to: The Secretary of State, Himmelsk, 10 North Main, Cedar City, Utah 84720. The Royal Family Succession Harald I Fairhair 872-930(?) Norway Founder Erik I Bloody Axe* 930-934(?) Knut I 938-967(?) Island period Harald II 967-999 Erik II 999-1010 Knut II 1010-1030 Harald III 1030-1047 Eric III 1047-1069 Knut III 1069-1093 Harald IV 1093-1124 Eric IV 1124-1167 American West period Knut IV 1168-1196 Harald V 1196-1232 Eric V 1232-1272 Knut V 1271-1333 Harald VI 1333-1368 Eric VI 1368-1403 Knut VI 1403-1443 Harald VII 1443-1492 Eric VII 1492-1493* Knut VII 1493-1534 Harald VIII 1534-1567 Eric VIII 1567-1595 Knut VIII 1595-1633 Harald IX 1633-1667 Eric IX 1667-1710 Knut IX 1710-1743 Harald X 1743-1777 Eric X 1777-1827 Knut X**** 1827-1845 Exile period begins Harald Blodok XI Eric Blodok XI Knut Blodok XI Harald Blodok XII Eric Blodok XII Knut Blodok XII Harald Blodok XIII Eric Blodok XIII Knut Blodok XIII Harald Blodok XIV Eric Blodok XIV Knut Blodok XIV Eric Blodok XV 2004- Monarchy restored ----------------------- * Eric I Blodok ("bloody axe") reigned for less than five years and was deposed by his brother, Haakon, who came out of exile to assume the crown of Norway. King Knut I had departed Norway prior to his father's loss of the throne. ** Longest reign (62 years) * Shortest reign (less than one year). ** King Knut X did not ascend to the throne for two years since he was only five years old at the time of his father's death. The acting King was his guardian, Prince Haakon. At age seven King Knut was deemed mature enough to assume the kingship. Other items of contemporary interest THE BLODOK NAME The name Blodok is an ancient Norwegian word meaning "bloodaxe," the name given to the early Norwegian kings who were widely known as fierce warriors. It has passed down unchanged through more than 13 centuries. THE CURRENT REIGNING COUPLE The current reigning couple, King Eric and Queen Clara, live in Hoboken, New Jersey, where they own a combination used car lot and billiard parlor. They are prominent in New Jersey society circles and are affiliated with several social and civic clubs including the Hoboken Fight Club, the Brillo Beauty College Alumni Association, the Benevolent Order of Buffalo (B.O.B.), the Mechanics and Trades Union, and the Free Tibet Society. Very active in volunteer services, King Eric has served as a Salvation Army Santa Claus, as the Easter Bunny for the Marymont Easter Egg Hunt, and as Chief Spelunk of the Hoboken Spelunkers Association. Queen Clara has served as president of Hoboken Chapter of the Marky Mark Fan Club, vice president and secretary of the Hoboken Chapter of the Engelbert Humperdink Fan Club, and has been a Homeroom Monitor for the Calabro Primary School. The couple are parents of a daughter and two sons: Princess Annelie, Prince Knut and Price Aksel. Other members of the Royal Family include the Queen Mother as well as several aunts and uncles including Countess Agnes Blodok, and Count Edvard Gustav Blodok. THE HIMMELSK CROWN JEWELS The crown Jewels of Himmelsk are used at Coronations and other ceremonial events and are the regalia which has been used since the monarchy was restored four years ago. While the monarchy is in exile (during the time each year when the king and queen are at home in Hoboken, New Jersey), the crown jewels are stored for safe keeping in a vault at City Hall. The Crown Jewels have a checkered history. When the Himmelsk royalty was overthrown in 1846, it was long believed the jewels were stolen and sold on the black market. But all of the items being shown were found in a cave where they had been placed by loyal subjects of the Blodoks Family. The Crown Jewels were protected evidently by a Viking warrior whose body was recovered with the jewels. The body was found to be in remarkable condition, presumably preserved almost intact in a barrel of rum which the warrior evidently fell into when he expired. The monarch ordered the warrior be taken to a local taxidermist and the stuffed upper torso of the condottiere is on display during the Festival Royale, continuing to protect the crown jewels even in death. The jewels consist of solid gold crowns especially fashioned by Himmelsk artisans and worn only at special national events, diamond studded tiaras worn solely by the queen or her daughters, jeweled brooches of precious stones, and other jewelry the monarchy has allowed to be displayed for the public during the Festival Royale. Other items found in the cave, such as the Sovereign's Orb, the jeweled Sword of Offering, the coronation ring, the Royal Mace, and the Great Sword of State remained locked in the vault and will not be seen by commoners until the next coronation. Protecting the Crown Jewels while they are on display is a member of the King's Guard of Honor. The distinctive uniform was designed personally by the king and queen to reflect the royal dignity and was inspired by the uniforms of Napoleon's France, which the king and queen have long admired. The Guardsman protecting the jewels is equipped with a special weapon, the Kigamonic Revolver, which is regarded by security forces everywhere as the ultimate weaponry. The Guardsman himself has pledged to forfeit his life rather than let bums and other scalawags take off with the precious gems and golden crowns. He has been carefully trained and has been ordered not to smile during the period he is guarding the Crown Jewels. To make him smile could result in death both for the Guardsman and his tormentor(s). THE MONARCH'S FLAG According to Wikipedia, the official encyclopedia of the Monarchy, the raven banner (in Old Norse, Hrafnsmerki; in Old English, Hravenlandeye) was a flag, possibly totemic in nature, flown by various viking chieftains and other Scandinavian rulers during the ninth, 10th and 11th centuries CE. The flag, as depicted in Norse artwork, was roughly triangular, with a rounded outside edge on which there hung a series of tabs or tassels. It bore a resemblance to ornately carved "weather-vanes" used aboard Viking longships. Scholars conjecture that the raven flag was a symbol of Odin, who was often depicted accompanied by two ravens named Hugin and Munin. Its intent may have been to strike fear in one's enemies by invoking the power of Odin. As one scholar notes: "The Anglo-Saxons probably thought that the banners were imbued with the evil powers of pagan idols, since the Anglo-Saxons were aware of the significance of Odin and his ravens in Norse mythology." According to the Heimskringla, Harald Hardrada flew a raven banner called Landoyoan or "Land-waster"; whether this was the same banner as that flown by Sigurd of Northumbria is unclear. In a conversation between Harald and King Sweyn II of Denmark, Sveinn asked Harald which of his possessions of his he valued most highly. He answered that it was his banner (merki), Landoyoan. Thereupon Sveinn asked what virtue it had to be accounted so valuable. Harald replied that it was prophesied that victory would be his before whom this banner was borne; and added that this had been the case ever since he had obtained it. Thereupon Sveinn said, "I shall believe that your flag has this virtue if you fight three battles with King Magnus, your kinsman, and are victorious in all." Years later, during Harald's invasion of England, Harald fought a pitched battle against two English earls outside York. Harald's Saga relates that when King Haraldr saw that the battle array of the English had come down along the ditch right opposite them, he had the trumpets blown and sharply urged his men to the attack, raising his banner called Landoyoan. And there so strong an attack was made by him that nothing held against it. Harald's army flew the banner at the Battle of Stamford Bridge, where it was carried by a warrior named Frirek. After Harald was struck by an arrow and killed, his army fought fiercely for possession of the banner, and some of them went berserk in their frenzy to secure the flag. In the end the "magic" of the banner failed, and the bulk of the Norwegian army was slaughtered, with only a few escaping to their ships. Other than the dragon banner of Olaf II of Norway, the Landoyoan of Harald Hardrada is the only early Norwegian royal standard described by Snorri Sturluson in the Heimskringla.
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